Diets. Self-help books. Gym memberships. Book lists. Vitamins. Miracle pills. To modify an aphorism: “The road to depression (as well as bankruptcy and guilt) is paved with good intentions. We’ve all been subjected to the litany of horrible infomercials, the slick Photoshop bodies, the too-good-to-be-true slogans, and the amazing deals that can be yours if you “just call now.” As incredible as the products we are daily bombarded with are, what’s even more amazing than the wonder-working powers of Vitameatavegamin is that there is no end to these gaudy lies and tacky falsehoods on every streetcorner and supermarket magazine stand. You’d think that, after a while, word would get out that 95% of what’s being sold cannot and will not deliver what the marketers would have you expect. It seems that one sweet day, the marketers would be forced to stop their nonsense because the world’s population finally discovered how to see through the half-truths. But this glorious day is yet to come. For some odd reason, the average person will still be sold a product marketed as a palace even while knowing that in the end he’ll wind up just buying the farm.
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