When I was pregnant with my son David Samuel, born in the heat of last July, I wondered if I could make a sort of bargain with God. I knew David would be disabled, and I prayed either that God would heal him completely or that God would take his life in mercy. I would walk my neighborhood with David Samuel in my belly, and cry and pray, sometimes twice a day. I was looking for God. Where could He be, in the face of such terrible news?
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