Derek and Matt were off galavanting at “some big conference in America,” and so the show this week is hosted by Alastair. He’s joined by Andrew and Rachel Wilson, and they are talking about the couple’s latest book: The Life You Never Expected.
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Finally, as always, follow Alastair and Andrew for more tweet-sized brilliance. And thanks to Timothy Motte for his sound editing work.
[…] This week’s Mere Fidelity podcast has a very depleted cast; only Andrew and I were around, as both Derek and Matt were at ETS. I took the opportunity to discuss Andrew’s new book, The Life You Never Expected: Thriving While Parenting Special Needs Children, with Andrew and his co-writer and wife, Rachel, who joined us on the show. I highly recommend the book to you and hope that you find the discussion helpful. […]
Thank you for this episode and book (which I’ve ordered). I especially liked that you wrote it before things were more stable/better. A few comments from my experience (as a parent of a special needs kid now age 28, defying the statistics — our miracle kid):
1. It was a comfort to me when I learned to ask for the prayers I couldn’t pray (“I know I’m going to need lots of patience when … but I can’t pray then. Please pray patience for me for when I can’t pray for myself.”) And it let me frame my dark experiences in a way that my faith community could help. .
2. We, too, learned to re-define the “normal” expectations without guilt. Christmas shopping went out the window, as did “traditional” family vacations or gatherings. The letting go of these expectations drew us closer to God even as it separated us from the “world.” For what it’s worth, our non-special needs kid grew up with these changes and is doing well and with grace in his family.
3. So also, we agree with your comments about thankfulness vs. entitlement. This is a lesson that our experience brought to our faith community as well, including their expectations of what Sunday School or Confirmation or other programming for children should look like.
4. In that context, I would have liked to hear more about your community of faith (I’ll be reading the book and let you know if I find it there!). My experience as a parent of a special needs kid has made me more conscious of how children are gifts to a community, not just to parents. Think of the Luke nativity stories in this light.
Thanks again for this episode. And we’re praying for your third child and your family. Peace.