Okay, so the title is a stretch. It’s so obviously a dire attempt to get clicks that it’s laughable. Let’s just acknowledge that fact and move on.
Problogger (whom I read avidly–gratuitous flattery points, anyone?) is hosting a group writing project. He’s offering one prize of $1001 dollars. There have been a gazillion entries, and I’m most likely not going to win. Let’s acknowledge that too. We blog because it’s fun, dang it, not because it pays (but when it does pay, it just makes it more fun).
That said, as I was stalling submitting my entry, I thought that what we needed were some good old fashioned ways of wasting time. Like the good old days, before this newfangled “web 2.0” and social networking and all that business. That said, here are my “Top 5 Forgotten Ways of Wasting Time While Waiting for Creative Inspiration to Strike.”
1) Paper Football. Remember that game? Consider it the gentleman’s “Bloody Knuckles,” Fold a piece of paper into a triangle, scoot it across the table, and score a touchdown when it hangs over the edge without falling off the table. Then take out your opponents eye when “kicking” a field goal.
2) Choose Your Own Adventure. Bet you didn’t know these little books had a website, did you? For some reason, that sullies these idiosyncratic texts that seem to so perfectly capture the spirit of the 80s (or maybe just the pictures did). Don’t cheat, though, by holding your thumb in one spot and checking out all the possible endings, lest you end up in “Choose Your Own Adventure Hell.”
3) Rubik’s Cube. The classic time waster. Good thing they’ve got an online version now for all of us “new media” folk. I’m sure it was a safety issue–too many people throwing it through windows after spending countless fruitless hours trying to solve the stupid thing. Bonus smarty-pants points for solving it with your eyes closed (is this even possible?).
4) Parcheesi. Because it’s fun, and because I can’t get it out of my head. Move along, folks.
5) Make shapes from clouds. Really, I can’t imagine a better way of wasting time. It works on airplanes. Everyone spent hours doing this as children. And yet only 7 people in the 43things network want to do this. Come on, people!
Thus endeth my list of “Top 5 Forgotten Ways of Wasting Time While Waiting for Creative Inspiration to Strike.” Perhaps Mere O readers (who, I must confess, are far more sophisticated than me!) would care to add their own?
Matthew Lee Anderson
Matthew Lee Anderson is an Associate Professor of Ethics and Theology in Baylor University's Honors College. He has a D.Phil. in Christian Ethics from Oxford University, and is a Perpetual Member of Biola University's Torrey Honors College. In 2005, he founded Mere Orthodoxy.
