If you give a dude a kale chip

From the New Yorker:

If you give a dude a kale chip, he’s going to ask for some coffee to go with it. He’ll probably want to know if the beans are in season, and how recently they were roasted. Reading about the coffee’s origins on the back of the bag will remind him of the local farmers’ market going on that day, and he’ll want to take you.

He’ll want to fixed-gear-bike there, and, rather than a helmet, he’s going to want to wear a beanie to “keep his head warm.” He’s going to raid your closet until he finds not only the perfect cuffed one but also a denim jacket that belonged to your mother in college. He’ll probably tell you that his personal style is not a “style,” per se, but a representation of himself expressed through vintage finds with punk inflections. While explaining this, he’s going to forget about the farmers’ market, so you’re going to have to remind him.